all i can think about is our trip japan. we leave a week from thursday. i've been planning my outfits. yes i know is ridiculous, but i think probably because there's not a whole lot else i can plan or anticipate, because neither of us want to go crazy scheduling a jam-packed itinerary, that now the biggest thing i have left to analyze is whether or not i should bring my middle-weight coat. and what shoes will be the most stylish and most comfortable?

also, my hair feels strangely tight in the back. i wonder if it's possible for tight curls to have the same affect on one's scalp as a tight ponytail.

and we'll laugh and toast to nothing

all i've been doing lately is going to work and coming home then working on work and making lists and staring at my wall that has the lists taped up on it.
its so funny how easy it is to feel really shitty about things that are not at all shitty. like having your own show at the bakery you work at and having to make 'art' that people are going to see and maybe, just maybe, purchase. my stomach's been acting up for the first time in a few weeks and i had a muscle spasm in my neck pretty much all day and i haven't been sleeping very well. all things considered, however, i feel pretty great. sean and i made reservations at an adorable place to stay in kyoto for when we go there for a weekend trip for when we go to japan the country and for when we are there for the CHERRY BLOSSOMS. oh my god. one month away. i'm so excited. also, 1 out of 3 things i'm making look pretty okay and i love everyone except people that are stupid and i've been eating soooo many jordan almonds which is really just so good. tonight i'm going to take a muscle relaxer for my neck and watch america's next top model and top chef and eat chips with caitlin.

here's what i'm sick of hearing about:
the democratic nomination (hillary, please stop being an asshole)
elliot spitzer (already)
anything that has to do with american idol (still)
how we didn't have a real winter (i know, okay? it sucked)

who's ready for spring?!??!?!??!?!?!?!?

iiiii feeeeeeelllllsooooooo boooorrrrrrinnnnnnngggggggggggggggggggg

LCD on a cookie

last week at work.

charmingwall

these pieces are going to be for sale at charmingwall gallery's "tiny art show". its located at 191 west 4th street. the opening is this saturday from 6-8pm. you should come. xoxo

i really should be sleeping because my alarm is set for tomorrow morning at 6:29. and i know that once i put down my computer and turn on some music its going to be at least another 30 minutes before i fall asleep. which means if i did that right now (which obviously i'm not going to) i'll be getting around 6.25 hours of sleep. which, at one point in my life, could have been considered a lot but no longer can considering i can never get out of bed these days. the one things i'm really excited for about waking up tomorrow at 6:29 is seeing how light the sky will be since its been two whole weeks since i've been awake on a saturday that early and two weeks ago i was amazed that the sky i was used to seeing black was instead twilight blue. crepuscular blue, as someone once told me. tomorrow the blue might be paler still and then, sometime, in the next few months, it will be white. i like how in the morning our eyes see the sky as white even though we know its blue. maybe its just in comparison to black. any lightness can look white in comparison to black. or something.

its going to be spring soon.

weekend at our nation's capital

and my stomach didn't hurt once.

new york new york

sometimes i wonder if i the only time i can be by myself without feeling lonely is when i'm living somewhere where i don't know anyone. even today, while taking a two hour walk to a store that ended up being closed, i was on the phone or accompanied by cat power. while wandering around i bought some dried fruit from a silver-haired man in a middle eastern shop that was pilled with boxes of pistachio and honey sweets, cans of tuna, and huge class jars full of gluten-free snacks. my new goal is to find solace in new york while i can still call it home. i need to feel like my reasons for wanting so badly to leave are there regardless of the fact that this city is really quite spectacular. on my walk home i really wanted tea and started to keep my eyes out for a coffee shop when i saw a bodega and decided to get it from there instead. while craving tea in hoboken when i was there the other week, and having a hard time finding a place to get it, i was realizing that its actually not the most normal thing to be able to get a hot cup of tea or coffee from the same place that you can get your beer (or ginger ale) and $3 cheese sandwich. it's really a beautiful thing. i got a large.

the results are in

fuck.

on all the celebrity reality shows they always have a 'life coach' which is crazy but i can't pretend i'm not jealous.

after telling tyler that lately i feel like i spend 1/4 of the day making myself feel crazy he told me that everyone does that. which made me feel better until i thought of everyone walking around just driving themselves mad. and which made me feel better until i realized that it doesn't make me feel any different.

thinkintthinkintthinkinthinking

i always thought that i would make things that reflected what i was thinking about. i guess that's not really the case because everything i've been making lately looks like i'm not thinking about anything. which is the opposite of true. eh, what are ya gonna do?

baby genius

while babysitting last night i was informed by oscar, age two, that he likes wearing his underwear backwards because he likes to be able to see the picture on them. i'm having a really hard time thinking of anything in the world more hilariously adorable than that.

bakereeeeeeee

tyler's mom gave me all kinds of baking goodies so i can start making baked goods from home. i'm so excited. best gift ever.

and the tea pot was pretty much perfect too. and the bathrobe.